My last post, on Feb 27, was an exercise in ego: I couldn’t bear to interrupt my perfect record of blogging something at least once a month ever since I began in August 2011. And so, I fed my vanity with a rather vacuous entry.
It’s now May 1st, and as I look at the Previous Posts archive on this site, there is no entry for April 2014.
I’ve done it! I let go of the obligation and the ego, and didn’t post anything. I resisted the urge to satiate my vanity once again. From now on, forever, there will be a hole; the streak has been broken.
I’m healed!
Or have I merely replaced (upgraded, downgraded?) my vanity with pride? Have I set aside ego for some sort of minor rebellion, some kind of subtle manipulation?
The facts that I have noticed my “victory,” the truth that I waited until today in order to preserve my absent April, assure me that my sense of self is alive and well, perhaps a little too “healthy,” obese from having gorged on itself without respite for even a single month.
